Monday, February 25, 2013
Facebook Fast--Part 4
It's the morning of Day 12 of this Facebook Fast. As more people have realized I am off of Facebook, the upside of Facebook has found me. Family & friends have been reaching out to me, checking on me to make sure I'm ok, and sharing updates & news with me, showing friendship to me, & highlighting my value to them in word & deed. This is how I hope Facebook to be and what I hope I do for others when I'm on Facebook.
However, one of the reasons I took a break from Facebook was because some of the things happening on Facebook were devaluing me, and even on this Facebook Fast, it seems I am unable to avoid this. Some of it has reached me still from the great Facebook beyond. Here's the really troubling part--I'm allowing it! No, I'm not talking about allowing people to be cruel to me by words or actions. I can't control what others say or do. I'm talking about allowing their words & actions to devalue me. How foolish. My value has already been set & cannot be changed no matter what anyone says or does to me. For if any of you accepts the sacrifice of Christ on your behalf, "you were bought with a price, do not become slaves of men." (1 Corinthians 7:23) I don't think I need to paint this picture any clearer. God, your Creator, saw you as so valuable that He gave up a measure of His own life, in Christ, to reclaim you. He loves you that much and wants you that much and sees that much value in you! And even if you haven't accepted the gift of that sacrifice, God still did this for you. He saw the abundance of your worth. He spent the price to purchase you into freedom with no strings attached, not even requiring the guarantee of your acceptance of this gift before the price was paid. Me? I don't even like the idea of spending money on a smaller, earthly gift without feeling some assurance that the recipient would want it, much less the idea of giving up my life for someone who didn't want what it would offer them. But God---God knew our need so well and valued us so greatly that He was willing to pay the highest price for a gift to us without even the slightest assurance that we'd even accept it. My thankfulness for and awe at this are overwhelming.
How is it, then, that I can face criticisms of men, rejection by friends, or harsh words and deeds from family and suddenly forget my value? I am ashamed to admit it happens far too often. And I cringe, thinking about how my words & actions may have made others lose sight of their value. How wrong. I think we all seek to be valued, and I doubt this is a glitch within us, but rather a divinely created attribute. The glitch is what we do with it--where we look for our value. Do we look for our value in what we accumulate in home, possessions, or money? Do we look for our value in what we achieve through fitness, notoriety, power, position, productivity? Do we look for value in the eyes of those that watch us? God already set our value. God has already told us through the willingness of Christ to lay down His life for ours that we are precious to Him. We are worth His own sacrifice.
So, how do I remember that when people are trying to steal my joy as though it's the only option for having their own? Wait. Maybe I just answered my own question. Maybe when people are trying to devalue me or steal my joy, it's because they don't understand their own value. Maybe they think it's an either/or situation. Either they are happy or I am happy. Either they are valuable or I am. And yet this isn't the way it is at all. "For God so loved the world, that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life." (John 3:16) Yup, He did this because He saw the value of each and all of us. His price was for all of us, not just one. We are all that valuable to Him. If I can show them their own value, then maybe they won't feel the need to steal mine. And even if they don't see it or accept that gift for themselves, I can see it in them and in myself. And I can see that my value can't be diminished by someone else. My value is in God. Thank you, God, for giving my life value beyond measure and also for the gift of perspective, that you allow us to see our value and the value of others through Your eyes.
I hope that I can return to Facebook with this perspective: seeing my worth & the worth of others through God's eyes, comfortable in the knowledge of my own value in God. And when ugliness surfaces, I hope I can remember that underneath is the same value that God sees in me & you--the same value He was willing to sacrifice His own life, in Christ, for. I can love through the ugliness because He first loved me through mine. "But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." (Romans 5:8)
"We love because He first loved us."
1 John 4:19
However, one of the reasons I took a break from Facebook was because some of the things happening on Facebook were devaluing me, and even on this Facebook Fast, it seems I am unable to avoid this. Some of it has reached me still from the great Facebook beyond. Here's the really troubling part--I'm allowing it! No, I'm not talking about allowing people to be cruel to me by words or actions. I can't control what others say or do. I'm talking about allowing their words & actions to devalue me. How foolish. My value has already been set & cannot be changed no matter what anyone says or does to me. For if any of you accepts the sacrifice of Christ on your behalf, "you were bought with a price, do not become slaves of men." (1 Corinthians 7:23) I don't think I need to paint this picture any clearer. God, your Creator, saw you as so valuable that He gave up a measure of His own life, in Christ, to reclaim you. He loves you that much and wants you that much and sees that much value in you! And even if you haven't accepted the gift of that sacrifice, God still did this for you. He saw the abundance of your worth. He spent the price to purchase you into freedom with no strings attached, not even requiring the guarantee of your acceptance of this gift before the price was paid. Me? I don't even like the idea of spending money on a smaller, earthly gift without feeling some assurance that the recipient would want it, much less the idea of giving up my life for someone who didn't want what it would offer them. But God---God knew our need so well and valued us so greatly that He was willing to pay the highest price for a gift to us without even the slightest assurance that we'd even accept it. My thankfulness for and awe at this are overwhelming.
How is it, then, that I can face criticisms of men, rejection by friends, or harsh words and deeds from family and suddenly forget my value? I am ashamed to admit it happens far too often. And I cringe, thinking about how my words & actions may have made others lose sight of their value. How wrong. I think we all seek to be valued, and I doubt this is a glitch within us, but rather a divinely created attribute. The glitch is what we do with it--where we look for our value. Do we look for our value in what we accumulate in home, possessions, or money? Do we look for our value in what we achieve through fitness, notoriety, power, position, productivity? Do we look for value in the eyes of those that watch us? God already set our value. God has already told us through the willingness of Christ to lay down His life for ours that we are precious to Him. We are worth His own sacrifice.
So, how do I remember that when people are trying to steal my joy as though it's the only option for having their own? Wait. Maybe I just answered my own question. Maybe when people are trying to devalue me or steal my joy, it's because they don't understand their own value. Maybe they think it's an either/or situation. Either they are happy or I am happy. Either they are valuable or I am. And yet this isn't the way it is at all. "For God so loved the world, that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life." (John 3:16) Yup, He did this because He saw the value of each and all of us. His price was for all of us, not just one. We are all that valuable to Him. If I can show them their own value, then maybe they won't feel the need to steal mine. And even if they don't see it or accept that gift for themselves, I can see it in them and in myself. And I can see that my value can't be diminished by someone else. My value is in God. Thank you, God, for giving my life value beyond measure and also for the gift of perspective, that you allow us to see our value and the value of others through Your eyes.
I hope that I can return to Facebook with this perspective: seeing my worth & the worth of others through God's eyes, comfortable in the knowledge of my own value in God. And when ugliness surfaces, I hope I can remember that underneath is the same value that God sees in me & you--the same value He was willing to sacrifice His own life, in Christ, for. I can love through the ugliness because He first loved me through mine. "But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." (Romans 5:8)
"We love because He first loved us."
1 John 4:19
Friday, February 22, 2013
Facebook Fast--Part 3
In my first post about this Facebook Fast, I mentioned that I have been including a verse (or several) from Scripture to test & approve my posts before publishing. This has been super-helpful for me in determining which words, thoughts, or observations should be allowed out on a field trip. At first, I was just thinking about it in terms of The Blog, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized that I need to be doing this not just with my written word, but also my spoken word. Obvious, right? Sometimes even the obvious is overlooked. God is convicting me that I let an abundance of useless words out of my mouth. I don't know why I do this. I consider myself smarter than that. Alas, smarts doesn't translate into wisdom. Maybe I speak too quickly or draw too much from emotion...I, honestly, don't know. I suppose if I did know, I'd be better at managing it. God is giving me a gift through this Facebook fast and in resurrecting this blog. He has reintroduced my brain to His word...His perfect word. Yes, God's word is perfect....mine, not so much. Knowing that, then it stands to reason, if I can align my words with His then I will be on my way to a wiser approach.
So the current process goes something like this: Thought pops up. What verse can I connect with that thought? Is this thought carefully constructed enough to be allowed out? Once my thoughts have found words, will my words line up with God's words?
It's changing the way I speak & write, for sure. I feel that it's beginning to change the way I think too. Time will tell. I suppose that, at very least, writing and speaking this way will put my conscience at ease no matter what feathers may get ruffled because if my words are aligned with His, then any arguments set up against them may, in fact, have very little to do with me at all. They may simply be pretensions set up against the knowledge of God.
Now, I have yet to achieve perfect obedience to Christ and am certain that I never will in this life, but I will persist in training. I will continue to work at it even if it's just in baby steps, if that's all I can do. Let my training for obedience not just be on that which is revealed by word and deed, but more importantly on the inside where those things are born. One little baby step? Take my thoughts captive before they are released. Hold them hostage and make them obedient to God's Word, first with one thought, then another, and then another, building up strength and stamina, just as one would train physically.
Goal:
"We demolish arguments & every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought and make it obedient to Christ."
2 Corinthians 10:5
So the current process goes something like this: Thought pops up. What verse can I connect with that thought? Is this thought carefully constructed enough to be allowed out? Once my thoughts have found words, will my words line up with God's words?
It's changing the way I speak & write, for sure. I feel that it's beginning to change the way I think too. Time will tell. I suppose that, at very least, writing and speaking this way will put my conscience at ease no matter what feathers may get ruffled because if my words are aligned with His, then any arguments set up against them may, in fact, have very little to do with me at all. They may simply be pretensions set up against the knowledge of God.
Now, I have yet to achieve perfect obedience to Christ and am certain that I never will in this life, but I will persist in training. I will continue to work at it even if it's just in baby steps, if that's all I can do. Let my training for obedience not just be on that which is revealed by word and deed, but more importantly on the inside where those things are born. One little baby step? Take my thoughts captive before they are released. Hold them hostage and make them obedient to God's Word, first with one thought, then another, and then another, building up strength and stamina, just as one would train physically.
Goal:
"We demolish arguments & every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought and make it obedient to Christ."
2 Corinthians 10:5
Monday, February 18, 2013
Facebook Fast--Part 2
I have definitely developed a constantly running inner monologue that desires to burst forth at the first opportunity. And not that I don't have anything interesting to say, but not every word needs to be spoken.
In my Facebook fast, I am finding myself thinking strange things...things I hadn't found strange while on Facebook, things I may even have found brilliantly amusing to post on Facebook. I am quickly realizing that my mind is cluttered with questions, quotes, quips, & quirky remarks that really have no value--wait, worse--they may even hold some negative value. Many of these thoughts that made their way to Facebook were just random musings about nature, or anecdotal kid stories, or joking laments about my body or abilities, or sometimes just a poor attempt to prove to myself (for the record) that I am actually productive during the day. Probably none of my posts were overtly negative, but they were distractions from real life. My posts weren't inherently bad, but neither were they beneficial.
"'Everything is permissible'--but not everything is beneficial. 'Everything is permissible'--but not everything is constructive."
1 Corinthians 10:23
This is the way I'm looking at my posts and all the words that escape my lips....not that they aren't ok to say, but are they beneficial or constructive?
"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen."
Ephesians 5:29
I don't know that my words were unwholesome exactly, but they weren't always "helpful for building others up" & I'm not sure they had the power to "benefit those who listen." Their negative impact would be that they were depleting people's time & filling their minds with the useless & meaningless, and not having a beneficial, or constructive, or positive impact. I don't want to seem melodramatic, and I'm well aware that I'm not the only one who uses Facebook that way. And I certainly don't want it to sound like I am judging anyone else's use of Facebook. God is working out a lesson in me that I'm sure will have much less to do with Facebook and much more to do with my whole life. I also don't want to suggest that there was no benefit or building up on Facebook. I have certainly seen it used that way on many occasions, even in my own life. However, the ratio of beneficial to meaningless became ridiculously unbalanced for me--at both the input and output level.
So, the next part of this Facebook fasting lesson for me is this:
"The lips of the righteous nourish many, but fools die for lack of judgment." Proverbs 10:21
-and-
"The wise in heart accept commands, but the chattering fool comes to ruin." Proverbs 10:9
If my words are to be nourishment to anyone, they can't just be an abundance of scraps; they should be choice morsels, carefully & thoughtfully prepared.
"my inmost being will rejoice when your lips speak what is right."
Proverbs 23:16
Friday, February 15, 2013
Facebook Fast--Part 1
When I first joined Facebook, I was fairly unimpressed. It felt like conversing, but was filled with lag time and what felt like uncomfortable silence. Posts weren't that interesting....mine or the ones I was reading. Slowly, my friend list filled with like-minded family & friends. Then suddenly Facebook was a blast, filled with leisurely conversations, insight into my friends' interests, and invitations into their homes & lives. Facebook became a comfortable place of rich sharing with those I saw often or who lived far away. Experiences could be shared together, despite schedules colliding or miles between.
Then some more time passed and the ugly underbelly of Facebook friendship began to reveal itself...pride, competitiveness, dissension, slander, jealousy, gossip, etc. With that, came the realization that not everyone on my friend list was someone I would actually call friend other than in cyberspace. Suddenly, words are taken out of context or actions misinterpreted, and at best communications strained, but sometimes relationships are seriously damaged or severed. All of this, sometimes before you even know it's happening.
Recently, for me, some of the ugliness of Facebook floated to the surface, and I felt God challenging me to let Facebook go for a while. I knew it was to my benefit to listen, but do we always readily do what we know will benefit us? I don't. So, I whined....But, God, I use Facebook to keep in touch with family & friends that I won't be able to otherwise. And I reasoned...But, God, I get a lot of notifications about events & activities that are important to our schedule.
I'm not sure that God is facetious at all, but He made me to be, so I imagine His response to such childish behavior to be something along these lines: Duh! Really, Kim?! Did you really think I would ask you to do something without knowing all your dependencies & knowing just how it was going to affect you? Really?!
Oh sure, you'd think it would be enough for me to know that the God of our universe, the Creator of everyone & everything was telling me to step back from Facebook. I ashamedly admit, it wasn't. I reluctantly agreed and deactivated, but with the knowledge that if this didn't work out for me that I could come back. I approached this much like some of us do a new diet or fitness routine. I'll do it for today, but I can quit if the going gets tough. I didn't do it with enthusiastic faith. I think God can still use that baby step of faith and grow something from it. And, I assure you He is.
At the same time He was urging me to take a break from Facebook, I thought I found an out that God would approve of as an alternative to Facebook. I had started a blog a few years ago, but never really did anything with it. I figured that I could keep dumping thoughts & photos into that blog, just for the sake of recording our family life. However, blogging--even just for myself--feels very different from Facebook. I couldn't just enter random one-line thoughts into it, could I? No. I should enter posts of substance or posts that at least would be interesting to my kids or anyone that might accidentally stumble upon it. After all, I wouldn't want a stranger to happen upon my blog and think me to be a babbling, egocentric, airhead. Right? Within a very short time, a few entries went into the blog. Those first few entries seemed to cry out for a verse or two from Scripture. And, honestly, it seemed a good way to test & approve my posts before hitting the publish button. (More on that later.)
So, if I were to be completely honest, I'd say I was and still am suffering from a little Facebook withdrawal. My inner monologue was and is frothing with thoughts & observations that press to escape onto some medium. Each time one erupts, I think, Hey I should put that on Facebook! Oh wait, I'm not on Facebook anymore. Can I put it on my blog instead? No, not really. It would really just be empty words & ramblings. Woah! Wait a minute! Is that what I had been doing on Facebook all this time? Posting empty words & ramblings? Yes, Kim, it's true. This is one of the lessons I need you to learn through this Facebook fast. You need to take your thoughts captive, so that words don't just escape but are carefully constructed. Ouch! I'm only on Day 3 of my Facebook fast, and I don't know how long it will last, but God is already doing a great work in me. I am prayerful that I will follow Him through whatever other lessons He has in store for me, and that this lesson fully permeates my soul.
"When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise."
Proverbs 10:19
Then some more time passed and the ugly underbelly of Facebook friendship began to reveal itself...pride, competitiveness, dissension, slander, jealousy, gossip, etc. With that, came the realization that not everyone on my friend list was someone I would actually call friend other than in cyberspace. Suddenly, words are taken out of context or actions misinterpreted, and at best communications strained, but sometimes relationships are seriously damaged or severed. All of this, sometimes before you even know it's happening.
Recently, for me, some of the ugliness of Facebook floated to the surface, and I felt God challenging me to let Facebook go for a while. I knew it was to my benefit to listen, but do we always readily do what we know will benefit us? I don't. So, I whined....But, God, I use Facebook to keep in touch with family & friends that I won't be able to otherwise. And I reasoned...But, God, I get a lot of notifications about events & activities that are important to our schedule.
I'm not sure that God is facetious at all, but He made me to be, so I imagine His response to such childish behavior to be something along these lines: Duh! Really, Kim?! Did you really think I would ask you to do something without knowing all your dependencies & knowing just how it was going to affect you? Really?!
Oh sure, you'd think it would be enough for me to know that the God of our universe, the Creator of everyone & everything was telling me to step back from Facebook. I ashamedly admit, it wasn't. I reluctantly agreed and deactivated, but with the knowledge that if this didn't work out for me that I could come back. I approached this much like some of us do a new diet or fitness routine. I'll do it for today, but I can quit if the going gets tough. I didn't do it with enthusiastic faith. I think God can still use that baby step of faith and grow something from it. And, I assure you He is.
At the same time He was urging me to take a break from Facebook, I thought I found an out that God would approve of as an alternative to Facebook. I had started a blog a few years ago, but never really did anything with it. I figured that I could keep dumping thoughts & photos into that blog, just for the sake of recording our family life. However, blogging--even just for myself--feels very different from Facebook. I couldn't just enter random one-line thoughts into it, could I? No. I should enter posts of substance or posts that at least would be interesting to my kids or anyone that might accidentally stumble upon it. After all, I wouldn't want a stranger to happen upon my blog and think me to be a babbling, egocentric, airhead. Right? Within a very short time, a few entries went into the blog. Those first few entries seemed to cry out for a verse or two from Scripture. And, honestly, it seemed a good way to test & approve my posts before hitting the publish button. (More on that later.)
So, if I were to be completely honest, I'd say I was and still am suffering from a little Facebook withdrawal. My inner monologue was and is frothing with thoughts & observations that press to escape onto some medium. Each time one erupts, I think, Hey I should put that on Facebook! Oh wait, I'm not on Facebook anymore. Can I put it on my blog instead? No, not really. It would really just be empty words & ramblings. Woah! Wait a minute! Is that what I had been doing on Facebook all this time? Posting empty words & ramblings? Yes, Kim, it's true. This is one of the lessons I need you to learn through this Facebook fast. You need to take your thoughts captive, so that words don't just escape but are carefully constructed. Ouch! I'm only on Day 3 of my Facebook fast, and I don't know how long it will last, but God is already doing a great work in me. I am prayerful that I will follow Him through whatever other lessons He has in store for me, and that this lesson fully permeates my soul.
"When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise."
Proverbs 10:19
Thursday, February 14, 2013
Happy Valentine's Day!
"Let love & faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart."
Proverbs 3:3
Valentine's Love For My Kiddos
My attempt this Valentine's Day to show my kids that they are worth my time & effort are these heart-shaped lunch foods. Heart fruit salad, heart-shaped carrots, heart-shaped sandwiches, and even this store bought brownie shows them that I was thinking of them in the grocery store. I don't know if they will enjoy all these goodies as much as I enjoyed preparing them. I do know that they will know I love them and thought of them today because I made their lunches for them (which is usually their job) and they'll remember tomorrow when they open these specially prepared lunches. What are some special ways you show love to your children at Valentine's Day? We all could use some ideas. I'd love to know yours.
"And he took the children in his arms, put his hands on them and blessed them."
Mark 10:16
Wednesday, February 13, 2013
A Little Pre-Valentine's Day Love
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always PROTECTS, always TRUSTS, always HOPES, always PERSEVERES."
1 Corinthians 13:4-7
As if that's not enough to think about...
"This is the message you heard from the beginning: We should love one another."
1 John 3:11
Not just those that you think deserve it....who are we to decide that?
"If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that?"
Matthew 5:46
So,
"Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God."
1 John 4:7
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