Parenting My Belief

I am a parent.  So, I see through that lens.  One of the byproducts of being a parent for me is the inability to sleep soundly through the night.  I suppose that it's because, although my kids have been sleeping through the night for some time, I lie in my bed somewhere between well-earned slumber and the high alert status of a first responder, one ear open for the sound of crying that begs for soothing, vomiting that requires a bath and/or bucket, coughing that needs an inhaler, the THUMP of a child rolling too far (and out of bed)...well, you get the idea.  Of course, I would love to go back to the fully-contented & uninterrupted sleep of my pre-children days, but I gladly give them up for the four blessings God has bestowed upon me.  (Not my first thought in the wee hours, but it is how I feel during normal waking hours).  There are many nights that my parenting expertise is not needed, but it's often still that I wake to listen, remaining unable to return to sleep.  Dramatic sounding?  Why, yes, it is.  That's how everything seems during those "sleeping" hours when thoughts run wild into the darkness of the night.

It is during one such night when I voyage into contemplation over two words:  Belief & Parenting.  These words mean so much more in their verb states than their noun states.  Though many become parents, there are some that have no idea what parenting is.  They don't know the instinctual sacrifice of self for the greater good of their child or children.  Many call themselves parents, but haven't actually parented much at all--whether in areas of discipline, sacrifice, or love.   And until you have actually parented, being a parent doesn't mean much.

Isn't being a Believer the same?  You can call yourself a Christian.  You can call yourself a Believer, but until you actively start believing in God's promises, warnings, and truth, being a Believer means very little.  I want more than to be a Believer.  I want to Believe...with everything in me, with everything that I am, from the depths of my spirit.  I want to actively seek God's promises, warnings, and truth.

God, I know you tell me, "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you." (Matthew 7:7)  Help me to move.  Make me active.  Make my belief so alive that it rises & moves without hesitation.  Turn my belief into believing.